In a desperate move today, the Detroit Lions (aka Millen's Morons) hired Rod Marinelli as their head coach (do we see a pattern here? Is Matt Millen so concieted that he needs to hire coaches that have 'M' last names like him? Morningwheg.. Mariucci... and now Marinelli). Let's take a look at his vital stats:
* Assistant head coach/defensive line coach for Tampa Bay, where he has worked since 1996.
* Reputation as an outstanding line coach and teacher.
* Has never been a head coach at any level.
* Also has never been a coordinator, although Tony Dungy in Indianapolis and Lovie Smith at Chicago have tried to hire him for the job but the Buccaneers have blocked it.
* 56 years old, born in Rosemead, Calif.
* Played offensive and defensive tackle at Utah in 1968 before a one-year stint in Vietnam.
* NAIA All-America at offensive tackle in 1972 for California Lutheran.
* Coached 20 years at western colleges — Utah State, California, Arizona State and Southern Cal — before moving to the NFL.
WOW... So (not) impressed. Now, a few strategies he mentioned at today's press conference:
* “Football is a show-me game. I’m tired of talking. You start putting on pads and do the work. Let our film talk for us.”
* On quarterback Joey Harrington: : "I'd like to sit down and visit with him."
* “I want to be physical, that’s my style. I want to run the ball with power, defend with power.”
* "I belive in morale. It may be the No. 1 issue in this league."
* "I believe in the development of skill."
* "You have to be hard, but you have to be smart."
* "I want a team that will be in great physical condition."
* "I want a team that will play one snap at the time. And I know how to teach that."
Yeah, as if I couldn't have pulled similar gems right out of my ass, too. Things are really looking up for us this season. Oh, and I'm not bitter, in case you were wondering.
[Source: Detroit Free Press]
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